Tuesday, 24 February 2015

Picking your battles and priorities

Does parenting sometime feels like jumping from one battle to another? Somedays it feels like I'm just running around putting out fires. Eeeek, am I the only one that feels this way???

With my kids growing older and older and what seems to be faster and faster, we collide on certain issues far more than we used to. Some of the typical common battles are food, clothes, chores, birthday parties and play dates. Oh we also fight over extra curricular activities. This morning we faught over a swim cap. Oh and the other day we fought over school camp. Okay, we fight a lot.

I hate "battling" with my children. I've learnt to let go of a lot of things. A strategic move to lower my stress levels and create more peace and calm at home.

The morning rush to school used to consist of a lot of yelling on my behalf. I do my best to remove all distractions (namely technology) but it's still a struggle. My yelling has been replaced with a big list on the wall for the girls to follow so they don't forget anything like brushing teeth or packing their lunch. Which have  both happened before, several time. Instead of yelling at them to hurry up, I get in the car at 8:45 and wait for them there and its up to them to hurry up and get in the car for us to get to school before the bell.



Dinner time is also a battle. Watching my kids pick at their food drives me insane so instead of sitting there watching them NOT eat and telling them to eat, I get up and get on with things. We start eating dinner at 6 and if they aren't done by 7, no dessert and no reading before bed (two things they adore!). I once found my children in bed on evening when they hadn't finished their dinner, with the blinds wide open reading by use of the moonlight.

My kids get distracted. My kids eat very slowly. I'm running out of strategies to make mornings easier. I've tried packing lunches and school bags the night before, laying everything out so the kids don't have to figure out which uniform to wear or find socks, and STILL it's a battle.

I'm guessing the only solution is to lower my standards. If we're late, we're late. If the kids room is messy so what (except lego, thats a choking hazard for baby and I DO NOT want to step on another piece of Lego, ever again). I have a feeling we won't be late to school everyday. I wish my mood wasn't so intwined with being able to sit on the couch and see my floor. I thought the stubborn perfectionist in me began to fade once I had kids. She seems to be trying to make a revival.

I think a talk with the kids is needed, over milk and cookies, because as a family we are also a team and teams work together. Teams have a common goal and make game plans so evryone knows whats going on. Teams support each other

It's time I stopped taking all the blows for the team and come up with another game plan.


Mami 2 FiveMaternityMondaysSuper Busy Mum


Step 53,

6 comments:

  1. School runs are so stressful. I make a point of no technology in the mornings until they are both ready. My 4 year old takes ages to get ready while my 9 year old is dressed and ready in 15 minutes!

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    1. It's funny that we find school runs so stressful, yet when I was a child with both parents off to work from the early morning it was always my job to get myself ready for school and to school on time. ahhh how times have changed! thanks for your comment.

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  2. Yes most days are a battle for me too - I have no idea how I get out some days!! Ha ha. My twins like to push and test me. Fun! Thanks for sharing #sundaystars

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    1. I bow down to any parent with twins/triplets/quads/whatever comes after that. It must be a whole other struggle with multiple children of the same age!

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  3. Not easy hey ... these are part of my 'not looking forward to-s' on the parenting road. It seems you're devising strategies that are practical and helpful to ease the things you're not happy with. Well done. I suppose sometimes you've just got to response with rewards and consequences and let those do the loud talking and not your voice. All the best with it all. #maternitymondays

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    1. thank you! yes rewards and concequences, I really need to work on my consistency in those areas.

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